It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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