you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Alive.
So much puke
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
