Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize