Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
