North Korea, Best Korea!
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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