I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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