Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
it's like heaven, but drunker
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
