I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
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