She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
