watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
