question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
