I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
