Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Randomize
