Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Who died my cat blue again?
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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