I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
