new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
