we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
