If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
