We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
