My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
