yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
okay pat passed out under dana's car
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize