i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
