The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
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