then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
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