so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
