The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I want to fling myself into the sun
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Randomize
