even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
