She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize
