she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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