Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
