Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
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