I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Randomize
