I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
