Small penises have feelings too.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
