If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
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