i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
