Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
