Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize