i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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