If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
