So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Randomize
