turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Sorry about my life...
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
