when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
