from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Randomize
