dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
