maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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