Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
