What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
