All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
