im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
she told me i tasted like america
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
