Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
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