Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
he shaved USA in his pubs
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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